Japanese international marriages can’t only be based on love and passion, there’s something more than romance. It has some hardships that you’d better learn before you propose to your girlfriend. If you wonder: “Do Japanese women make good wives”, right here you’ll get some useful information.
Something about Japanese wives
Do Japanese women make good wives? The answer depends on your opinion about good wives. Some men think that good wives are shy and obedient, others want to see their wives as leaders.
Let’s see what Japanese women are like. About 51% of Japanese international marriages are ruled by wives, and not husbands. No matter, how long the couple has been married (1 year or 51 years), the woman begins to control her man as soon as she becomes the wife.
She takes charge in household finances and raising the kids. She takes care about the bills, the kids’ education and all the housework. Since she doesn’t work, she takes all the money from her husband, and gives him a little as their own pocket money.
So, men are considered breadwinners and women are homemakers. This tradition is several hundreds years old, and it influences the culture, the lifestyle and the workstyle of Japanese population.
Some men are happy about this, they can concentrate on their work and have a rest at home. But men say that they can’t satisfy their wives’ desires, and it becomes a reason for divorce.
Another interesting feature of Japanese wives is the fact, that they don’t get fat. Their lifestyle doesn’t approve walking lunches, fast food, eating too much. They eat simply, prefer rice, fruit, veggies, soy, fish. They don’t consider their food as a source of pleasure, but as a source of energy. It’s their fuel and not the sense of life.
It’s interesting, that some open-minded Japanese women, living abroad, can change their diet and get addicted to fast food.
Secrets to Happy International Marriage
Since you already know what a Japanese woman can be like, let’s discuss how to enjoy a family life with her.
It’s normal to have a “Do Japanese women make good wives” question, when you’ve fallen in love with a girl from Japan and want to live a happy life together with her.
A woman can be a good wife next to a good husband. If you both try to build a great marriage, discuss all the problems and don’t expect telepathy from one another, then you surely have a chance to become a happy husband of a Japanese wife.
We’d like to share some important secrets to happy international marriage.
- Pay attention to your cultural differences. Asian mentality is not Western, it’s unique and interesting. If you take those differences too lightly, your wife won’t understand you. Japan has so many traditions and etiquette rules, that you’ll easily be overwhelmed with them. If you’ve decided to live in Japan, you’d better do your homework and learn about its culture and traditions as much as possible. You can ask your Japanese wife for help, she’ll bring you much more information, than books, Internet and TV shows.
- International marriages are accompanied with homesickness. If one of the spouses lives abroad, he or she will miss their hometown and family. So, a good rule for a happy international marriage is jetting off home for a couple of days. It’s good to travel together, but when one of the spouses is too busy, the other can visit their hometown alone.
- Learn Japanese. Amazing Japanese girls don’t speak English. The whole Japanese nation doesn’t consider it necessary to learn any foreign language. It all starts with school, because methods of teaching English are not perfect. Since English is the only foreign language, taught at schools, the only thing students learn is reading and writing. They don’t learn how to communicate with foreigners and they don’t have many foreigners around them. That’s why they can be too shy to utter a single word in English.
What you should think about before you marry a Japanese woman
Marriage is a serious decision, and it’s not made overnight. When you analyze all the pros and cons, don’t forget to think about the following factors that will influence your family life greatly.
- Think about the kids. Choose the country for your living and raising kids. If you’re used to travelling from one country to another, as soon as you have a baby, you’ll have to settle somewhere for a couple of years. It’s not easy to travel with little kids, so don’t ignore that fact. Japanese wives feel better, living and raising their kids in their own country. And it’s quite obvious.
- Think about food. People are used to the food of their own country. Almost all people, in the whole world, love Japanese food. But if you can’t stand its taste and prefer a delectable roast beef, your Japanese wife will have a hard time. So don’t be too picky, allow yourself something Japanese, maybe you’ll even like that.
- Think about death. Memento Mori! If you’ve decided to stay in your Japanese wife’s country, think about your future if something horrible happens. What if your spouse, your only support in the strange surroundings, has an unfortunate accident? Will you be able to look after yourself and your kids? Maybe, you’ll have to move to your hometown together with them.
- Don’t forget about the parents. The hardest part of any international marriage is numerous relatives and, of course, parents. If you and your Japanese woman live in your country, she’ll miss them. She’ll want to invite them to your house, so that’s the thing you should discuss before marrying.
Well, all those recommendations are easy to follow. If you’re used to discuss all the problems with your foreign darling, can listen to her and comply with her request, you have many chances to be happy with her. If not, your marriage can end in divorce.
Possibility of Divorce
According to statistics, about 40% of international marriages with Japanese women end in divorce. Here’s the list of possible reasons.
- Cultural differences. Misunderstandings between spouses show the widest spread among marriages. When traditions and mentality are so different, there seems to be nothing in common between Japanese women and American men.
- Practical issues. Money is another serious reason for divorce. Since Japanese wives don’t work, their husbands are the only ones who earn money. It’s not easy to satisfy the family, because the wife and children always want more and more. The man faces the necessity to buy houses and cars, support his parents and his wife’s parents, cover expensive school fees. Sooner or later all that proves to be too much for his.
- Logistics. Japanese women have a strong family bond and deep connection with their relatives and parents. If a wife goes abroad after marriage, she’ll miss all her big family and want to visit them as frequently as possible. Flights to Japan and back are not cheap. What’s more, your wife may invite her parents and siblings to your house in the U.S. Are you ready for a crowd of Asian people at home?
A Japanese mother and wife
When a Japanese girl gets married, she forgets about her private life, hobbies, work and friends. She’s totally devoted to her husband and children. That’s what you need to know, when you wonder “Do Japanese women make good wives and mothers?”
- Children. If one spouse wants to have kids, but the other doesn’t, that’s another reason for divorce. When the international married couple already has children, it’s not easy to decide where they will stay after the divorce. According to Japanese traditions, they’re raised by mothers. So, before you split your family, ask yourself whether you’re ready to forget your children.
- Japanese women mentality. A great number of American men, who were married with a woman from Japan, describe their tendency to resort to violence and emotional abuse. It’s no good for mental health of the family, that’s why sometimes the best way out of this situation is divorce. Unfortunately, it’s impossible to predict that your beautiful Japanese girl will transform into Onibaba (demon woman in Japanese).
Well, now you know more about Japanese women. Do Japanese women make good wives? It depends. So, we wish you good luck and happy life in your Japanese international marriage!