Dating game is exciting, but troublesome. You’ll have to know your girlfriend well, learn about her interests, hobbies, personality. If you love your girlfriend, you’ll date her with pleasure. If she loves you back, you’re a lucky one.
But that’s not so easy as it seems. There are some mistakes that can ruin all your dating life. The issue is hard, when you’re a Western man and she is a Vietnamese girl. The cultural differences should be taken into consideration as well as languages. You’d better find a Vietnamese girlfriend, who speaks English, or learn some Vietnamese.
Here we’ll tell you tips what you should and shouldn’t do, while dating Vietnamese ladies. Let’s start with common mistakes which lead to the complete disaster.
What you should not do
Most mistakes follow inability to discuss cultural differences. They come from misunderstanding. Some Westerners don’t completely believe that girls from Vietnam differ greatly from those, who live in Europe or the USA. They have their unique Asian beauty and unusual mindset, that needs to be respected.
So, here’s the list of things you never ever should do, if you want to date with your Vietnamese girlfriend happily and then marry her.
Agree to group dates
This mistake is common for Westerners, who don’t know amazing Vietnamese girls well enough. If you meet a young and beautiful girl, who seems too shy to date with tete-a-tete, she may arrange a group date with you. If you agree, you’ll see the girl with a couple of her friends, and you’ll have to entertain them all! If your Vietnamese is not good, you’ll have real troubles.
You may want your girlfriend’s friends leave the two of you alone as soon as possible, but they may have some other plans. What’s more, she may arrive to the venue together with her friend, so she can’t be left behind.
If you’re recommended a group date, you’d better cancel this idea and arrange a date one by one with our girlfriend. Another thing you can do is agreeing a quick group date and then schedule your second date tete-a-tete soon. A group date is only good, when you already know your girlfriend and you both want to get married. It’ll be just a meeting with your friends and nothing more.
Follow advice from locals
If you are a newcomer in Vietnam, you probably think that locals know all those dating issues better than you. But it’s dangerous to follow all their advice without being selective. The real thing is that everything you hear from locals turns out to be quite far from reality.
It’s true especially about the men and women who are single. If they give you tons of advice, why can’t follow them? How successful are they in relationship?
So, don’t trust every single piece of advice you hear from the locals. No matter how long they have been living in Vietnam, they may know nothing about dating culture.
Go Dutch on Dates
Vietnamese girls come from patriarchal society, they’re used to following their men, but they expect their men to pay for them. That’s how they differ from Westernized girls, who want to be treated equally with men.
When you pay for your girl at a restaurant or at a café, it means that you can provide for her and treat her well. Of course, it doesn’t mean, that you’re going to pay for her all the time and buy her everything she wants.
Some Vietnamese girls, who date with foreigners, are gold diggers. They want to empty their wallet and then go away. It’s not the type of girls, who are created for long-term relationships and marriage.
Take girls to expensive place
The first date gives you a chance to learn something more about your girlfriend and tell her about yourself. Don’t make her believe that you’re the richest man in the whole world. The best place for the first date with a Vietnamese girl is a café nearby. It’s a good place to have a pleasant conversation. If you invite her to some luxurious place, you won’t be able to understand, what she’s interested in: you or your wallet.
Trust the girl you see for the first time
It’s necessary to screen your girl before you can trust her. We live in a cruel world, where some girls want to use men as a source of money. Vietnam is a country of a huge wealth inequality between poor and rich people, and poor want to become rich at all costs.
Money should not be discussed at the first date. If she asks you about your salary, your pay for rent, your expenses, it’s a red flag, that is impossible to ignore.
Go Western with Vietnamese girls
Dating Vietnamese ladies differs greatly from dating game with women from the US and Europe. When you meet a girl from Vietnam you should forget everything you’re used to, while you were living at home. Your sense of humor, over confident style, sarcasm and teasing don’t work here. You won’t attract girls, using those weapons. You’ll just make them go away.
Ignore Vietnamese culture and language
Some Westerners, who come to Vietnam, think they’re a big shot only because they come from Europe or the USA. They expect the local girls go crazy over them, just because of their nationality. But the truth is that beautiful Vietnamese girls, if they’re not gold diggers, don’t want to chase foreign men.
They need something more than just a man with a white skin and American or European passport. They need a polite gentleman. If you behave too confident, you’ll be called cocky or arrogant. Vietnamese girls don’t like it. So, if you want to make a girl from Vietnam like you, you’d better hold the door for her, give her flowers, and be polite.
But another thing that is expected from men in Vietnam is leading. If you’re unable to lead your girlfriend, she’ll lose respect in you.
Move too fast
Westerners are used to going to bed with their girlfriends as soon as possible. Some women, who live in the US and Europe, give it up quite fast, after the first or third date. But that doesn’t work with dating Vietnamese ladies.
Moving too fast is not popular in Vietnam. Dating game is a long and happy marathon out there, and not a sprint.
What you should do
Well, it’s enough to talk about troubles in dating Vietnamese ladies. Let’s have a look at the rules, which you’d better follow, if you want to have a long-term relationship with your girlfriend.
- Respect her culture. Don’t treat her like she’s an American or European woman. She’s an unusual Vietnamese lady. Many girls from Vietnam, who are not westernized, don’t drink alcohol. So, the best place for dating Vietnamese ladies is a café, and not a bar or a night club.
- Respect her private things. Almost every girl in Vietnam has her own motorbike. Some girls don’t allow anyone to touch it. But some allow their boyfriends drive it.
- Maintain the same level of relationship that you’ve set at the beginning. If you used to text her or talk to her over the phone for hours and hours, you have to keep it. Otherwise she’ll decide that you don’t care for her anymore.
- Care about logistics. When you invite your girlfriend to a restaurant, located far from her house, you should order a taxi for her. What’s more, you should remember that nosy neighbors are around you. They will stand and stare, while you’re going to your hotel with your girlfriend. Then they will gossip about you and her, and that’s not pleasant at all.
- Be prepared to being stared at. If you don’t look like an Asian man, all people around you will stare at you, when you’re out together with your Asian girlfriend. Some locals don’t approve international marriages, so they can hate you severely. Some of them hate all foreigners.
- Stay confident, but not arrogant. Vietnamese ladies feel the difference between these two. They’re ready to follow men, who can lead them. They love go-getters: men, who know what they want and get it. Men, who are sure, that they’re good enough and don’t get shy. Women want to be sure in their men, they need someone who can provide her and their future children with everything necessary.
Well, that was the list of things that you should and should not do while dating Vietnamese ladies. It’s not hard to be happy with a girl from Vietnam. You just have to be sincere and find the right girl, who’s good enough to stay with you forever.